Ever do something stupid then immediatly regret doing it? I did just the other day.. Emotions are a funny thing. They are powerful things created by ones own mind, they come to dictate the personality that defines you as a person and gives a specific image that people can identify you. But most ironic and confusing to me, that even the smartest of people can make the poorest of decisions when influenced by a strong emotion.
That means dumbasses like me are fucked.
Real Life or Second Life.... I often find myself questioning everything I do.. I never trust my gut instincts, and I consider myself to be hated by everyone that hasn't convinced me otherwise... And even in most cases i still think they do after they have gone out of the way to show me that they are my friend. I often cite a quote from scrubs: "Nothing sucks worse than feeling all alone, Even when theres lots of people around." But really? I have no call to say anything of that nature. the qoute is true, but when you loneliness is self imposed, and you become such an emotional trainwreck that you destroy every relationship you have built, do you really merit the pity spitting some line of crap like this is supposed to induce?
There really is no point to this blog post. No rhyme or reason. its just a collective dumping of some of the thoughts in my head. Lately I've felt like a prisoner to my own emotions and character flaws. And even though I have many people that are "here for me" I don't feel like I have anyone to vent to. So I do it here. Not like anyone reads this drivel anyways. I just don't feel its fair to dump my shit on any of my friends. They claim they are there to help, but its an abuse of their friendships, and I'm personally convinced that they don't want to do it. Especially when it comes to me, and I don't blame them.. I really should just shut up when shit bothers me. No good ever comes of venting anyways...
yeesh, Im a 13 year old emo kid....
New Room - New Trouble
2 years ago